As I think about what I want to do with the rest of my life, my back gets tense and my left eye comes close to twitching. It’s a slightly intimidating thought.[because, i mean, seriously, the "rest of my life" is incredibly daunting and all encompassing. There are few things I'm sure I will want to do for that long... at the same time, who's to say how long that will be?] I feel less sure about what I want to do after leaving this place (where I’ve learned and grown the last three and a half years) than I did when I started. However, I think I’m surer of who I am, or maybe who I’m not. I’m confident that my identity in Christ, according to the gospel, is secure no matter where I sojourn from here.
I guess I’m a little bit scared of making plans, but I do have ideas, hopes, interests and dreams. The small pieces of what I want to do are coming together. I’m still waiting for the connecting pieces to find their way into my life but that is the beauty of it, journeying forward even in the face of the unknowns, holding the hand of the One who knows all.
These are the few things I know I want to do: I want to be a disciple maker. This requires living intentionally and building edifying relationships with the people around me, investing in those who desire to seek the face of the Lord and serve Him. I’m still figuring out what that looks like outside of the college environment, which has proved especially conducive to such living. I have so much more to learn and I think I'm only beginning to understand the implications of the call of Christ to make disciples.
Secondly, I want to be involved in missions in some way, shape or form. I love cultures and find such joy in connecting in different ones. Seeing the gospel intersect a culture as well as people’s lives individually is one of the most beautiful and exciting things I think I’ve ever seen.
Lastly, I really do enjoy what I’ve studied in Print Media. I don’t know how it fits with the other things I’m interested but for now I’m seeking ways to continue develop my skills in writing and design. I’m meeting with different designers and editors from time to time just to learn about their experiences and how they’ve gotten where they are.
So where am I going? I have absolutely no idea. I’m in the process of working out an internship for the first year of my post-Moody [Bible Institute] life which is exciting, terrifying and somewhat sad all at the same time. This has been a rich place in my life. I guess that's pretty typical of a lot of college students. But, never-the-less, rich it has been in countless ways. Sometimes I’m amazed that I’m still alive when I think about the things I’ve endured here: crazy schedules, drama that accompanies living with 28 other women, cafeteria food (for which I’m grateful, don’t get me wrong…), and among other absurd things, unfathomable amounts of reading and papers. But, those things, and the unsolicited stress they’ve brought to my life over the past 3 ½ years, really pale to the people and experiences I’ve encountered. Its cliché and vague but I’m being sincere. I’m blessed. God is merciful and gracious.
