Sunday, May 25, 2008

learning who i am... or maybe who i wish i was?

This was my response to a friend's post, a poem about who she is. She ended with the question, "Who are you?"

I'm a citizen of heaven alone,
no other home has left me completely satisfied.

I'm a jeans, t-shirt, hoodie, and pony-tail kinda girl, most of the time. Every now and then I go back to my European cultural experiences, minus the heals.

I like blueberry muffins and espressos con pana sitting at the window of an upstairs coffee shop with a good, intellectually stimulating book, watching you walk by on the street below as I turn the pages. Oh, I can't forget the fireplace in the corner.

I want to see you succeed, but I'll love you even if you don't. In fact, I'll love you about an hour after I meet you, maybe less if it's an especially great day.

I'm an optimist but like to keep realistic expectations. I love to laugh and smile but still take life a little more on the serious side. I've been told I'm witty and feisty and in certain contexts I think I'm ok with that.

I like talking with intellectuals, sipping black coffee, dark plastic framed glasses, and i like to leave a conversation mulling over what has just been said. I like to sit down three hours after the conversation and journal my new thoughts on the topic.

I care deeply and once you're in my heart, you better get comfortable because you won't be going anywhere for a while. Its pretty tough to shake me (whether that is good or bad is up for interpretation.)

I feel your pain and confusion, sometimes even if you haven't told me about it. I wish I could take your pain away for you but I've learned that I can't and trying won't do either of us much good. But I will certainly hurt with you because hurting alone is one of the most painful things in the world.

I love people but I love Jesus more. and if the two conflict, it's hard but most of the time I'll choose Jesus.

I like DARK chocolate, and peanut M&M's but you get more regular peanut M&Ms for your money than dark chocolate ones. (unfortunately, cuz the dark chocolate ones are AMAZING!)

I like maps and globes and languages and would like to visit every country before I die.

I hate eating meals by myself. I'm under the conviction that meals are an experience to be shared with someone.

I have a high regard for integrity and living above reproach even if it means you don't like me very much.

I have a strange obsession with the word and concept of HOPE. my Hope in the Creator and Sustainer of the Universe is the only reason I'm still alive today.